From Anxiety to Peace: Crucifying the Flesh and Finding True Freedom in Christ
- rhiannakay
- Aug 7, 2024
- 8 min read
Updated: Aug 8, 2024
Have you ever felt an unexplainable void despite doing everything right? After fervently praying for God’s guidance, I repeatedly heard the phrase
“Crucify the Flesh”.
Anxiety and confusion had come unexpectedly with a vengeance, and I didn’t understand where it originated from.
The phrase references Galatians 5:24-25:
“Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.”
I wondered how this fit in with what I was experiencing.
My Journey with Anxiety
Having experienced past trauma through mental, physical and emotional abuse, I’ve been familiar with anxiety to varying degrees. I have sought out healing and worked hard on managing the anxiety when it arises.
When we experience anxiety, it can be very crippling. It can manifest as tension in our bodies, panic attacks, hyperventilating, insomnia, irritability, or becoming detached. Changes in eating patterns and mental focus are also common.
Usually, these feelings of anxiety tend to happen in a few different circumstances for me. The most common reason is when I’m getting closer in my relationship with God or about to serve the Lord by speaking about the past and the strategies the enemy uses to manipulate us.
I also experience anxiety when I indulge in worldly things. The last option, being too caught up in worldly things, wasn’t even on the radar as a possibility.
Normally, it has been to a lesser degree and shorter-lived since giving my life to Jesus. After, re-dedicating my life to Jesus, I tried to be intentional with my walk.
So, I believed it must have been related to my growing relationship with God, as the Holy Spirit was convicting me and urging me to reveal the enemy's tactics in my life.
Not only had I sacrificed income, a community of friends, and over $1,000 in belongings, but I was also reading God’s word daily. I started praying and watching sermons and testimonies regularly, and Christian and wholesome music and videos replaced my usual entertainment.
Growing more in faith and wisdom, I found the courage to speak to others as the Holy Spirit was guiding.
Before devoting my life to Jesus, there was always a baseline of anxiety and bouts of crippling depression. Moments of happiness were fleeting.
The beliefs I had adopted from the “spiritual” community kept me in a never-ending loop of trying to “fix” or heal myself and maintain control over the negative emotions. Positive thinking was supposed to resolve all issues, but it was a temporary fix.
The problem originates when you continue to revisit the same issues. Healing was described as layers of an onion, with many layers to peel away. I often wondered how many layers there could be.
Why did I, and so many I worked with, continue to experience the same patterns even after years of doing the internal work?
The New Age used various strategies: shadow work, chakra work, reiki, acupuncture, ayahuasca retreats, past life regression sessions, light language, and working with spirit guides. These modalities initially felt good but yielded short-term results. Usually, one would end up right back in the same situation and patterns.
Even during fleeting moments of happiness, I still felt anxious and void. Emotions, especially negative ones, were seen as a hindrance and only necessary if you could detach from them.
They were a lesson in what you still needed to heal or grow from. There’s some truth in this, but not in its entirety.
Finding True Peace in Jesus
All this spiraling stopped when I surrendered to Jesus. It felt as though a void was filled, and there was eternal joy that couldn’t be taken from me, even during tough times.
Jesus acknowledges tough times in scripture (John 16:33) but encourages us to give our burdens to Him:
Matthew 11:28-30
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest in your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
It’s illogical to believe you can avoid life’s obstacles by controlling your thoughts and emotions. The fact is bad things happen to good people and vice versa.
Emotions are in constant flux, and you can even experience many at the same time. It’s normal to experience emotion; you need to learn not to let them consume you.
The spiritual community tried to bypass this, usually unsuccessfully.
The best healing and relief from being consumed by emotions I’ve experienced has been through faith in Jesus. As I read the Bible, I became aware that He’s the ultimate healer.
It’s impossible to heal without God.
Putting on the Full Armor of God
As I’ve mentioned in my previous blog, God’s word is the guide, and the Holy Spirit is the compass. This is true for navigating our emotions and healing journey.
Epiphanies happen as you read God’s word and through the conviction of the Holy Spirit, you are made aware of the truth. That’s why we are told to use the full armor of God against the enemy in Ephesians 6:10-18.
“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore, put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”
Crucifying the Flesh
What exactly are we supposed to guard ourselves against? What are we supposed to crucify in the flesh?
Simply stated, anything that contradicts the path laid out for us and denies God’s true nature and His will for our lives.
Initially, these things will be very subtle. A lot of times, they can appear innocent and good-natured, not revealing themselves until you are too far in.
This is true with the culture today, with TV shows, music, and social media. As a society, we tend to base our ideals, image, and likes/dislikes on what the majority is doing.
From there, we idolize those who meet the standards set by the majority.
Challenging Societal Norms
I always thought that I marched to the beat of my own drum. I prided myself on being different or not conforming. However, reading a passage in John hit me like a ton of bricks:
John 12:42-45
“Yet at the same time many leaders believed in Him. But because of the Pharisees, they would not openly acknowledge their faith for fear they would be put out of the synagogue; for they loved human praise more than praise from God.”
That’s exactly the part of the flesh I needed to crucify. Even being “different,” I still tried to be agreeable and didn’t like upsetting anyone.
Displeasing or feeling as though I had offended anyone used to eat me alive. God has been working on this within me, but there are areas where it’s still prevalent.
Other areas that came up through conversation with others and in testimonies were self-image and finances. There has always been an underlying issue of how I see myself, feeling as though I didn’t quite fit the mold of what the world sees as attractive.
Then, of course, there’s the subject of money. There’s constant stress on providing and making enough financially for myself and the kids to fit the societal mold.
Seeking True Worth
The Holy Spirit convicted me. Do any of these superficial things hold meaning?
Logically speaking, people come and go, fads change, and money can’t buy happiness or love. We work so hard for these things that bring temporary happiness.
What we really are looking for in all of this is love and acceptance. We want to be part of a community. We want to be acknowledged.
When our spirits leave this earthly realm, what does any of this matter anyway?
Cultural Observations
The way modern culture is set up is very superficial and self-focused. It is breeding narcissism, and we are so consumed by meeting societal standards that we don’t have time to truly relate to others on a deep and intellectual level.
In reference to what is said of end times:
2 Timothy 3:1-7
“But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God- having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people. They are like the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over gullible women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires, always learning but never able to come to a knowledge of truth.”
Our culture has become increasingly materialistic, and with the growth of social media, more detached. In-person human interaction has declined, leading to the decline of meaningful relationships.
Conclusion
With all of this in mind and the downfalls of living for this world being revealed, I now understood the importance of crucifying the flesh. Living for the superficiality of the world is not how God intended us to live.
Real love and connection are becoming extinct, as is our connection with our Creator. As we focus more on self and try to find validation in superficial things, we are pulled more into the darkness.
My previous experience with the New Age was the same struggle of the exhaustive search for truth and feeling empty.
What practice was the right one to conform to? That too usually was based on the trend of that time.
The consistency of the one true God brought me rest. His words haven’t changed or deviated since the beginning of time. The guidelines are clear and perfectly outlined.
We are imperfect and sinful by nature, but He showed us mercy through the perfect sacrifice of His son, Jesus Christ, who lived sinlessly and overcame death.
Why?
To show that there is life after death and that we too could overcome death through believing in Him and repenting of our sins. Nothing is impossible with God.
He loves us so much and wants us to choose Him. We were not meant for a world such as this. We are meant to be one with God.
However, God’s true nature is love and He is just. The more we live in sin and accept sin, the more it pulls us away from God.
We aren’t worthy of being in God’s presence on our own, because as humans, we chose to live in a way that doesn’t align with the nature of God. Jesus took on all our sins so we could be with God!
Jesus is the way, our mediator, our savior.
I believe this is why we experience anxiety, depression, and emptiness when we do things that aren’t in alignment with God’s word, or we don’t have a relationship with God. We are pulled more towards darkness, away from the Light of God, away from truth.
It’s okay to enjoy things in this world remembering that there’s a fine line between enjoying God’s creation and being consumed by worldly distractions. Idolizing people and placing a focus on materialistic things leads us away from the path that God has designed for us.
I realize that all that matters is loving God and truly loving others—not what people have or their status, but as children of God. None of these worldly things mean anything or determine our worth. All that matters are our souls and glorifying our creator.
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